Bill Eddy, author of Splitting, High Conflict People In Legal Disputes, among several other titles dealing with high conflict personalities - is our guest.  Bill  joins us to discuss what you need to look for when choosing an attorney, with specific emphasis on the high-conflict divorce & custody dispute.  Mr. Eddy will also be discussing the recent launch of New Ways For Families and his upcoming book.

You can listen to our past shows and see our forthcoming schedule by clicking here:  MrCustodyCoach Blogtalk Radio Program

Knowing the child support statutes in your state is important even if you have an attorney, but if you are representing yourself it’s even more important. Negotiating child support with an angry ex spouse can be filled with tension, so a custody coach can come in handy to help you look at all the scenario’s and determine what you should be asking for in court.

Studies show that fathers that are involved in the lives of their children are more likely to be current on child support, so it’s in the best interest of both parents to make sure child support is fair, and custody is shared.

Child support, just like child custody, can change repeatedly throughout your children’s lives, so being prepared for modification requests is imperative. Sourcing hidden income, and strategy with a custody coach can also save on attorneys fees. Read more of our articles on child support and become a member today.

Parental alienation is the act of one parent trying to convince the children that the other parent is a bad parent, out to hurt them, or simply doesn’t really want them. Alienating parents make comments around the children about not having enough money because the other parent won’t give them any, even though they are receiving child support.  Or, they refuse to allow the other parent to see the kids and then tell them that they just didn’t show up.  Sometimes, it’s much more serious alienation attempts like the Mother that told her children Dad planned on killing them during his planned Disney World vacation with the children.

Mr. Custody Coach and his team help parents recognize the signs of parental alienation and create a parenting plan to help combat the ongoing attempts and reverse the alienation that has already occurred. While some courts recognize and act against parental alienation, most do not, so it’s important to take action in your relationship with your children immediately. Read more of our articles on parental alienation and become a member today.

False allegations can take the form of physical, sexual or emotional abuse of either your ex or children, drugs or alcohol, neglect, or even abandonment. Harassment is also often reported. Mr Custody Coach can tell you what to avoid doing, and what you should definitely do in order to disprove false allegations almost immediately.

Unfortunately if you wait to address these issues until they happen, it can often mean you don’t see your children for a period of months or years, and are removed from the home you rightfully own or belong in. If this does happen, EVEN if you are proven innocent, the courts can and often DO, use this time apart from your children as an excuse that you should now have less or supervised time with the children as they don’t know you anymore or may be fearful of you. Read more of our articles on false allegations and become a member today.

Often times, attorneys count on this, it’s the easiest way for them to make money. Attorneys will prepare a “Standard” custody agreement under the idea that the parents will do what is best for the children, but if you are here, chances are, your ex isn’t doing that. A custody coach is more concerned with helping you eliminate stress and get an agreement that actually works.

Mr Custody Coach gives you ideas to include in your custody agreement to stop problems before they happen, whether it’s where and how exchanges take place, how holidays are divided, where the children will go to school, who can sign them up for extra curricular activities, and at whose expense. While phrases like “reasonable contact” may work in custody situations where the parties can get along, it rarely works in high conflict relationships where one parents believes reasonable contact believes they can call their children every hour on the hour and if they don’t get an answer they call the cops to report that they are missing. It happens, we’ve seen it. Creating a custody agreement that anticipates problems, outlines solutions, and provides incentive for each party to follow the agreement is imperative in high conflict custody situations. Read more of our articles on custody agreements and become a member today.

Custody evaluations are supposed to determine who the “better” parent is, and then the evaluator writes a recommendation on what the custody agreement should look like. The court can and usually does take this agreement at face value, since the judge hasn’t met with the parents or children themselves. Attorneys can argue the merits of the recommendation, but in some states can’t even call the evaluator into court to answer why they recommended what they did.

Custody evaluations can be intimidating, the evaluators biases can skew the recommendation, and most of the time the evaluator doesn’t see real life interaction, or enough interaction to really make an informed decision. Parents in high conflict custody situations can have problems describing what it happening, and proving their issues without coming across as being controlling. Mr Custody Coach helps parents put their concerns into words, with documentation showing their concerns are real. Custody coaching during a custody evaluation can help you understand what the evaluator expects to hear, how they like to hear it, what you should never say, and how you can get your concerns listened to. Read more of our articles on custody evaluations and become a member today.

Mr Custody Coach provides information and coaching on how to create solid custody agreements that not only put the children first, but minimize contact between the parents in order to stop harassment. Mr Custody Coach deals with issues like one parent withholding the children during the agreed upon exchange time, how to overcome restraining orders that were created under false allegations, making sure the children receive the appropriate education and more.

• Religion
• Holidays
• School Breaks
• Vacation
• Exchanges
• Extra Curricular Activities
• Moving
• Child Care
• Health Care
• Education
• Relationships
• Contact, ie phone calls, etc
• Discipline
• Contempt of Court

Custody doesn’t end with an agreement, each parent must follow the agreement to make it work, and unfortunately, this is where most people really need a custody coach, as problems that were never thought of crop up.

Imagine a simple thing like the custody agreement stating that custody is from Sunday to Sunday, but doesn’t say what time, where, or who is to do the driving. While parents who get along can usually agree on these things and make changes when needed, parents that are in a high conflict custody situation can rarely speak on good terms. Mom has plans on Sunday until 6pm so she wants Dad to pick them up at her house at 6:30, but Dad has plans that start at 5pm, so that’s not possible, he would like a 4:30 drop off by Mom since he drove last time. Mom doesn’t agree, so she says, sorry, too bad, you can’t have the kids. What should be a simple exchange turns into one parent dictating how things will happen to the other parent, regardless of how this impacts their life or plans. And of course, the children are stuck in the middle.

Custody coaching can anticipate these problems in advance and recommend a custody agreement that leaves little room for conflict. After an agreement is reached and problems appear, a custody coach can help determine what is most important, offer solutions, and most importantly, create a buffer so your tension levels don’t skyrocket everytime there is an issue.

Mr Custody Coach helps clients research and prepare common letters and responses in order to save time having your attorney simply review the materials rather than having them create them from scratch.

Custody agreements in high conflict cases are almost always useless when prepared from standard agreements that are not written for parents that literally can’t talk to each other. Attorneys and the court systems believe the parents will do what is in the best interest of the children, but this is rarely the case. That’s why we see clients that continually have to go back to court to get their custody agreement changed in order to stop the conflict, stop the alienation, and stop the harassment.

When you create a custody agreement that solves these issues the first time, you don’t have to pay your attorney to continually be changing the agreement and going to court to fight for your rights. Honestly, most attorneys don’t have a lot of experience with truly high conflict cases, or with clients that may be up against someone with a mental illness that encourages more conflict like a personality disorder. Mr Custody Coach is specifically geared towards helping clients in extremely negative custody cases.

Parental alienation can be as simple as a Mother telling her child to ask her Father for new shoes because “I can’t afford them,” implying to the child that her Father is keeping money from her Mother, to more serious issues like a Mother telling her children that their Father plans on kidnapping them when he takes them to Disney World. While both Mothers and Fathers are capable of parental alienation, it is more often done by the parent that has primary custody, so Fathers are at more risk of being alienated from their children since Mothers are primary custodians in 85% of custody cases. No matter who commits the alienation, it’s wrong, and has a significant impact on the children who are denied a loving relationship with a parent.

Mr Custody Coach helps parents recognize and combat signs of parental alienation by recognizing how and why parental alienation takes place, and formulating plans to show the children and courts how the family is being affected.

High conflict divorces often pit one parent against the other in an unending game of trying to win the child’s affection and squash their love for the other parent. Often this is done because the parent feels hurt and angry, and often it’s done to win the coveted child support, it’s almost always done in spite of the effects on the children. Mr Custody Coach and our team can help you navigate getting a fair custody agreement that benefits the child the most with both parents sharing custody equally unless one parent is unfit, stopping or reversing the effects of parental alienation, creating a parallel parenting plan that stops the harassing phone calls, emails, and public outrages, and reducing your attorney fees.

A custody coach looks out for your best interests and understands how a seemingly innocuous phrase in a custody agreement can wreak havoc on your daily life. We go beyond what an attorney does. An attorney is hired to help you get the divorce, and get the custody agreement, but they aren’t there to help you answer the 27 emails your ex sends you a day, or the 16 text messages. They don’t know what you go through during child exchanges, or care how often your calls to your child are ignored. Mr Custody Coach gives you real life ideas that can be put into place today in order to lower the stress you feel, and help you have a great relationship with your children, without dealing with your ex-spouse except when necessary.